bamatone.net

Where in the world should I live?

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 17:51:21 GMT

But really, let's keep it confined to the good ol' U.S. of A.

View Poll: #1911192

Heyooo

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 15:51:43 GMT

I'm glad I never told y'all about my girlfriend, because I don't have one anymore!

Homicide

Sun, 06 Jan 2013 20:58:24 GMT

One of my favorite TV shows of all time is Homicide: Life on the Street. In one episode (The Documentary), the detectives launch into a multi-person soliloquy explaining Miranda rights, the interrogation room, and confessions. I've always considered it a truly amazing scene.

Homicide the TV series was based on a book written in 1991 by David Simon called Homicide: A Year of Killing on the Streets. I've owned the book since around 1998, but finally got around to reading it a few weeks ago. In the middle of Chapter 4, Simon launches into this exact same scene, only much more drawn out. It's so impactful, I'm going to quote it here, along with the scene from the TV show.

You are a citizen of a free nation, having lived your adult life in a land of guaranteed civil liberties, and you commit a crime of violence, where-upon you are jacked up, hauled down to a police station and deposited in a claustrophobic anteroom with three chairs, a table and no windows. There you sit for a half hour or so until a police detective - a man you have never met before, a man who can in no way be mistaken for a friend - enters the room with a thin stack of lined notepaper and ball-point pen.

The detective offers a cigarette, not your brand, and begins an uninterrupted monologue that wanders back and forth for a half hour more, eventually coming to rest in a familiar place: "You have the absolute right to remain silent."

Of course you do. You're a criminal. Criminals always have the right to remain silent. At least once in your miserable life, you spent an hour in front of a television set, listening to this book-'em-Danno routine. You think Joe Friday was lying to you? You think Kojack was making this horse-shit up? No way, bunk, we're talking sacred freedoms here, notably your Fifth Fucking Amendment protection against self-incrimination, and hey, it was good enough for Ollie North, so who are you to go incriminating yourself at the first opportunity? Get it straight: A police detective, a man who gets paid government money to put you in prison, is explaining your absolute right to shut up before you say something stupid.

"Anything you say or write may be used against you in a court of law."

Yo, bunky, wake the fuck up. You're now being told that talking to a police detective in an interrogation room can only hurt you. If it could help you, they would probably be pretty quick to say that, wouldn't they? They'd stand up and say you have the right not to worry because what you say or write in this godforsaken cubicle is gonna be used to your benefit in a court of law. No, your best bet is to shut up. Shut up now.

"You have the right to talk with a lawyer at any time - before any questioning, before answering any questions, or during any questions."

Talk about helpful. Now the man who wants to arrest you for violating the peace and dignity of the state is saying you can talk to a trained professional, an attorney who has read the relevant portions of the Maryland Annotated Code or can at least get his hands on some Cliff's Notes. At let's face it, pal, you just carved up a drunk in a Dundalk Avenue bar, but that don't make you a neurosurgeon. Take whatever help you can get.

"If you want a lawyer and cannot afford one, you will not be asked any questions, and the court will be requested to appoint a lawyer for you."

Translation: You're a derelict. No charge for derelicts.

At this point, if all lobes are working, you ought to have seen enough of this Double Jeopardy category to know that it ain't where you want to be. How about a little something from Criminal Lawyers and Their Clients for $50, Alex?

Whoa, bunk, not so fast.

"Before we get started, lemme just get through some paperwork," says the detective, who now produces an Explanation of Rights sheet, BPD Form 69, and passes it across the table.

"EXPLANATION OF RIGHTS," declares the top line in bold block letters. The detective asks you to fill in your name, address, age, and education, then the date and time. That much accomplished, he asks you to read the next section. It begins, "YOU ARE HEREBY ADVISED THAT:"

Read number one, the detective says. Do you understand number one?

"You have the absolute right to remain silent."

Yeah, you understand. We did this already.

"Then write your initials next to number one. Now read number two."

And so forth, until you have initialed each component of the Miranda warning. That done, the detective tells you to write your signature on the next line, the one just below the sentence that says, "I HAVE READ THE ABOVE EXPLANATION OF MY RIGHTS AND FULLY UNDERSTAND IT."

You sign your name and the monologue resumes. The detective assures you that he has informed you of these rights because he wants you to be protected, because there is nothing that concerns him more than giving you every possible assistance in this very confusing and stressful moment in your life. If you don't want to talk, he tells you, that's fine. And if you want a lawyer, that's fine, too, because first of all, he's no relation to the guy you cut up, and second, he's gonna get six hours overtime no matter what you do. But he wants you to know - and he's been doing this a lot longer than you, so take his word for it - that your rights to remain silent and obtain qualified counsel aren't all they're cracked up to be.

Look at it this way, he says, leaning back in his chair. Once you up and call for that lawyer, son, we can't do a damn thing for you. No sir, your friends in the city homicide unit are going to have to leave you locked in this room all alone and the next authority figure to scan your case will be a tie-wearing, three-piece bloodsucker - a no-nonsense prosecutor from the Violent Crimes Unit with the official title of assistant state's attorney for the city of Baltimore. And God help you then, son, because a ruthless fucker like that will have an O'Donnell Heights motorhead like yourself halfway to the gas chamber before you get three words out. Now's the time to speak up, right now when I get my pen and paper here on the table, because once I walk out of this room any chance you have of telling your side of the story is gone and I gotta write it up the way it looks. And the way it looks right now is first-fucking-degree murder. Felony murder, mister, which when shoved up a man's asshole is a helluva lot more painful than second-degree or maybe even manslaughter. What you say right here and now could make the difference, bunk. Did I mention that Maryland has a gas chamber? Big, ugly sumbitch at the penitentiary on Eager Street, not twenty blocks from here. You don't wanna get too close to that bad boy, lemme tell you.

A small, wavering sound of protest passes your lips and the detective leans back in his chair, shaking his head sadly.

What the hell is wrong with you, son? You think I'm fucking with you? Hey, I don't even need to bother with your weak shit. I got three witnesses in three other rooms who say you're my man. I got a knife from the scene that's going downstairs to the lab for latent prints. I got blood spatter on the them Air Jordans we took off you ten minutes ago. Why the fuck do you think we took 'em? Do I look like I wear high-top tennis? Fuck no. You got spatter all over 'em, and I think we both know whose blood type it's gonna be. Hey, bunk, I'm only in here to make sure that there ain't nothing you can say for yourself before I write it all up.

You hesitate.

Oh, says the detective. You want to think about it. Hey, you think about it all you want, pal. My captain's right outside in the hallway, and he already told me to charge your ass in the first fuckin' degree. For once in your beshitted little life someone is giving you a chance and you're too fucking dumb to take it. What the fuck, you go ahead and think about it and I'll tell my captain to cool his heels for ten minutes. I can do that much for you. How 'bout some coffee? Another cigarette?

The detective leaves you alone in that cramp, windowless room. Just you and the blank notepaper and the Form 69 and... first-degree murder. First-degree murder with witnesses and fingerprints and blood on your Air Jordans. Christ, you didn't even notice the blood on your own fucking shoes. Felony murder, mister. First-fucking-degree. How man years, you begin to wonder, how many years do I get for involuntary manslaughter?

Whereupon the man who wants to put you in prison, the man who is not your friend, comes back in the room, asking if the coffee's okay.

Yeah, you say, the coffee's fine, but what happens if I want a lawyer?

The detective shrugs. Then we get you a lawyer, he says. And I walk out of the room and type up the charging documents for first-degree murder and you can't say a fucking thing about it. Look, bunk, I'm giving you a chance. He came at you, right? You were scared. It was self-defense.

Your mouth opens to speak.

He came at you, didn't he?

"Yeah," you venture cautiously, "he came at me."

Whoa, says the detective, holding up his hands. Wait a minute. If we're gonna do this, I gotta find your rights form. Where's the fucking form? Damn things are like cops, never around when you need 'em. Here it is, he says, pushing the explanation-of-rights sheet across the table and pointing to the bottom. Read that, he says.

"I am willing to answer questions and I do not want any attorney at this time. My decision to answer questions without having an attorney present is free and voluntary on my part."

As you read, he leaves the room and returns a moment later with a second detective as a witness. You sign the bottom of the form, as do both detectives.

The first detective looks up from the form, his eyes soaked with innocence. "He came at you, huh?"

"Yeah, he came at me."

Get used to small rooms, bunk, because you are about to be drop kicked into the lost land of pretrial detention. Because it's one thing to be a murdering little asshole from Southeast Baltimore, and it's another to be stupid about it, and with five little words you have elevated yourself to the ranks of the truly witless.

End of the road, pal. It's over. It's history. And if that police detective wasn't so busy committing your weak bullshit to paper, he'd probably look you in the eye and tell you so. He'd give you another cigarette and say, son, you are ignorance personified and you just put yourself in for the fatal stabbing of a human being. He might even tell you that the other witnesses in the other rooms are too drunk to identify their own reflections, much less the kid who had the knife, or that it's always a long shot for the lab to pull a latent off a knife hilt, or that your $95 sneakers are as clean as the day you bought them. If he was feeling particularly expansive, he might tell you that everyone who leaves the homicide unit in handcuffs does so charged with first-degree murder, that it's for the lawyers to decide what kind of deal will be cut. He might go on to say that even after all these years working homicides, there is still a small part of him that finds it completely mystifying that anyone ever utters a single word in a police interrogation. To illustrate the point, he could hold up your Form 69, on which you waived away every last one of your rights, and say, "Lookit here, pistonhead, I told you twice that you were deep in the shit and that whatever you said could put you in deeper." And if his message was still somehow beyond your understanding, he could drag your carcass back down the sixth-floor hallway, back toward the sign that says Homicide Unit in white block letters, the sign you saw when you walked off the elevator.

Now think hard: Who lives in a homicide unit? Yeah, right. And what do homicide detectives do for a living? Yeah, you got it, bunk. And what did you do tonight? You murdered someone.

So when you opened that mouth of yours, what the fuck were you thinking?

The A/V Problem

Fri, 04 Jan 2013 02:59:14 GMT

The issue

My current home theater setup will not allow video from one input source to be shown along with audio from a different input source.

Why this is a problem

In certain situations, I may want to listen to audio other than what is being fed to me by the cable television channel. Example: I want to watch Alabama vs. Notre Dame on Monday night while listening to the Eli Gold broadcast on The Crimson Tide Sports Network (via FM radio).

The backstory

Before I bought this house, I had a Logitech Z-5500 speaker system. It was my "poor man's" A/V receiver - a first, experimental foray into the world of surround sound.

And it was awesome. It really was a great first device. It had some issues, but all in all it did exactly what it was supposed to do. I ended up coupling it with an optical audio switcher, which allowed me to run the audio from the cable box, PS3, and standalone DVD player through the surround sound speakers. (My roommate owned the PS3, so I still needed me old DVD player hooked up in case he peaced out or took it with him on business trips, which happened often.)

This got me in the habit of watching video with a different audio source. Football is the most obvious example. But maybe I'm switched over to the PS3 playing some game during a commercial. I can still be listening to the cable box while playing, then switch the video source back to TV when I hear it come back. Or I could be watching a hockey game whilst listening to a Blu-ray DVD performance of Dave Matthews through the PS3. This is a total first world problem if I ever heard one, but it was really neat to have all these options.

Fast forward to about two years ago. I now live in a house with built in surround sound speakers in the living room. Having mentioned that I wanted to graduate from the Logitech amp, my dad graciously gifted me a Yamaha RX-V667 "digital home theater receiver" for Christmas.

It's fantastic. I have the cable box and PS3 hooked up, and it can handle AM/FM/XM radio, has TONS of input options, and includes a "Zone 2" feature that I use to run audio out to the back porch. In fact, using this Zone 2 method, I can do exactly what I want to do in Zone 1 (my living room) -- play the radio while the TV is showing cable!

But... like I said. Can't do that in the same zone. Are you with me?

Here's what literally happens:

If I choose Input 1 (cable TV), I get both audio/video from the cable box through the HDMI port. If I choose Tuner, I get audio from the FM radio, but the TV screen shows me an FM radio slider. Like, it's just a video companion for my radio listening experience. Essentially useless.

The solution(s) / workarounds

I've thought about how to get around this off and on ever since I got the receiver. I got a little closer to solving the puzzle a year ago for last year's national championship game.

Needing to get Zone 2 set up for the back porch, I realized that the cable box has multiple outputs. I could run standard RCA two channel audio (those red/white connectors) to somewhere else on the receiver (call it Audio 1) at the same time as the HDMI feeds the audio to my TV. The cable box didn't pick and choose, it just output the audio in both places. Cool. So I just simply turn on Audio 1 in Zone 2 and voila, cable box audio on the porch. (I already mentioned I could run the receiver's built in Tuner input (FM radio) to Zone 2.)

That's great, but it doesn't solve my problem inside the house. The HDMI from the cable box carries both audio and video to the TV/speakers, and I can't separate them.

Until today!

Today, I finally just sat and stared at this diagram of the back of the receiver until inspiration struck. And this is what I came up with:

I decided that I didn't have to use Input 1 (HDMI) for TV. That was the mental block all along. The cable box and the receiver both support component video (red Pr / blue Pb /green Y). So just like I had audio running out of both outputs (HDMI and RCA), I can do the same with video using HDMI and component. (Not to be confused with composite, which is the yellow plug you see with RCA red/white audio cables. Component is still high definition. Composite is complete shit.)

Ok, so I run component video cables from the cable box to AV1 on the receiver (left most input on the diagram). I've finally separated audio from video, and it was right there all along.

Now all I have to do is feed the FM radio signal into the audio input... which is optical (digital). Sigh. I have this really nifty FM radio that lets you set a delay, allowing you to sync up the radio broadcast with the obscenely slower TV feed. (It's similar to this, but not exactly what I have.) So of course the problem here is that the only output on this little gadget is a 3.5mm headphone jack. Definitely not optical audio. Definitely not even digital quality.

Amazon to the rescue! I think this little adapter plug is the only extra piece of equipment I needed to purchase at all today. Cost: $4.

I run a 3.5mm "line in" cable from the radio, through this adapter plug, and into the optical slot in AV1. Bam. Video from cable box; audio from Eli Gold on a 7 second delay.

Now, in the event that doesn't work for whatever reason, I also ordered this analog to digital converter. Through this device (and using this cable) I can still run the 3.5mm radio jack to the optical audio input.

So. My bases should be covered. This should work. I get the adapter and converter on Monday... just in time to run home and plug it up for the game a couple hours later.

Roll Tide. :)

Postscript: There is probably a better solution. If you have an alternate/better one, please let me know!

I'm still alive, you bozos.

Thu, 06 Dec 2012 00:08:46 GMT

Honest Injun!

Everything is gonna be all right!

Sat, 14 Jan 2012 04:36:11 GMT

Hi, people. Long time no post. :)

Thanks to Pandora, just ran into this sweet arrangement of "No Woman No Cry" by Blues Traveler and Ziggy Marley. Had to buy it. Had to post it!

With the TSA, "Every Traveler a Suspect"

Sun, 27 Nov 2011 21:01:00 GMT

From The Atlantic:

I'm at the Salt Lake City airport, and it probably won't come as a surprise to you that at least one TSA agent here thinks that sarcasm is just part of the job. I opted out of the new scanner--having looked it up now, it appears to have been a millimeter wave model--and was escorted over to the side after two agents gathered up all of my stuff.
"Have you been through this procedure before?" the agent asked.
"Yes," I answered.
"Just have to keep coming back for more?" he asked, somewhat to my surprise.
"You don't give me a choice," I said.
"Sure we do. You have a choice," he replied. "Scanner...or pat down!"
"I would have preferred to just go through the metal detector," I said. He paused.
"That's not a choice."
"I went through the metal detector on my way to Salt Lake City," I said. No answer.
"So what about the scanner is it that you have a problem with?" he asked
"Ionizing radiation," I said.
"There is no ionizing radiation!" he said, referring to his particular scanner.
"That's not true," I replied, not knowing which kind it was, since it's not posted anywhere on the scanner (and even if it was, I'd still opt out of anything beyond a metal detector). Also, the TSA's official phrases "whole body imager" and "21st century technology" say nothing about the use of ionizing radiation, x-rays, or terahertz waves; see http://blog.tsa.gov/2008/04/safety-privacy-concerns-regarding.html.
"What would you call ultrasound?" he asked.
"I have no idea what model or type of scanner that is," I replied. He proceeded to lecture me in a mocking tone as though I were an idiot.
"There's only two types: two flat boxes, that's backscatter x-ray. Round, that's millimeter wave. Flat boxes, x-ray. Round, millimeter wave. I don't blame you for not wanting to go near the backscatter, but this one's fine."
"Well, I've had six CT scans, so I really don't need any more radiation of any kind." (I'm aware of course that many things including visible light are part of the EMR spectrum, but I wasn't about to get into a debate over physics with the agent.)
"CT scans...those are local."
"Not necessarily," I replied. "And I've had two head, two chest, and two abdominal."
"Well, you could just do it to spread it all out." he said. He then ran my chap-stick through the X-ray scanner, and finally walked away, leaving me to think...what the hell?
So, it's clearly not the worst TSA story ever, but I think it highlights three points (which are nothing new to you):
A) the totally arbitrary nature of the scanner selection process;
B) that passengers' decisions to opt out should never be questioned as it's none of the TSA's business why I have a problem with the scanner, even though in this case I had no problem sharing why; and
C) that passengers' decisions to opt out should absolutely never be ridiculed, or even remarked upon in a manner that could be interpreted as ridicule.
Another thought that came to mind is that had I refused to answer the agent's question, depending on how obnoxious he was feeling, he could have said that I was refusing to cooperate. So either you disclose personal medical information to the government, or you're not cooperating. What a deal.

Hank Williams Jr. Quit/Fired From Monday Night Football For Calling Obama "Hitler"

Mon, 10 Oct 2011 15:22:50 GMT

I'm too lazy to pen any of my own thoughts here anymore. Instead, I just look around for something that's pretty close and already written. Voila.

From The Superficial (hilarious site, btw):

Because World War II is still too fresh in our minds after 80-something years – I can still feel his little moustache… – Hank Williams Jr. has been fired from ESPN’s Monday Night Football after calling President Obama “Hitler” during a FOX News interview where he was simply playing to the audience. But of course, we’re going to make a big deal out of this:

“We have decided to part ways with Hank Williams, Jr. We appreciate his contributions over the past years. The success of Monday Night Football has always been about the games and that will continue.”

While Hank initially apologized – which he shouldn’t have, but whatever, we’ll get to that – he’s now changed his tune and says he quit ESPN for treading on him, so here we go:

AFTER ESPN SUSPENDS HANK JR. FOR ONE-WEEK, HANK JR. DECIDES TO PULL HIS SONG FROM BEING USED ON ESPN FOR REMAINDER OF SEASON!

“After reading hundreds of e-mails, I have made MY decision. By pulling my opening Oct 3rd, You (ESPN) stepped on the Toes of The First Amendment Freedom of Speech, so therefore Me, My Song, and All My Rowdy Friends are OUT OF HERE. It’s been a great run.” — Hank Williams Jr

Seriously, is anyone actually offended when someone calls something they don’t like “Hitler” in the year 2011? It’s pretty much expected at this point. Christ, I’ve referred to sandwiches as the Holocaust. But a Republican country music star called Obama “Hitler” on a right-wing propaganda station? Oh my stars! NOTHING IS AS IT SEEMS ANYMORE! What ESPN should’ve done is exactly what everyone else did: Heard the news and went “Eh. What’re ya gonna do?” Instead, they’ve now created a media sensitivity-fest where Hank can wrap himself in the American flag and say, “Look what thar librul media done to me.” People say words other people don’t like. Fucking. Deal. With. It.

Now, that being said, Hank Williams and his Rabble Rousers need to back their Rascals up with the First Amendment talk because going on FOX News and criticizing the president without being jailed for it is literally the fullest exercise of Hank’s First Amendment rights possible. And this is what simple, conservative folk don’t get: Criticizing, or reacting negatively to something you just said is not a violation of your freedom of speech. Hank Williams Jr. has every right to call Obama “Hitler,” and ESPN has every right to pull his song off their property. That’s how shit works, but I’d be more than happy to explain it at gunpoint while giving a retarded person the chair. (I’m slowly learning their language.)

How your Android phone can survive without a power button

Fri, 16 Sep 2011 00:13:16 GMT

... Or at least a Nexus One.

Over the last couple of weeks, the power button on my Nexus One had been acting all a fool. Besides turning the phone on, it also turns off the screen and wakes the phone up. So it started getting annoying when I had to mash the button 5 or 6 times to turn the screen off.

On Sunday, my travel-to-Las Vegas day, it died for good. I should have known something was up when I was trying to turn the phone off on the plane and no amount of hitting the power button would bring up the power down menu. In a moment of stupidity, I removed the cover plate on the back of the phone and removed the battery. Immediate problem solved.

You know what happened next, of course. I wasn't able to turn the phone back on. How could I? The power button is broken. I was worried. The phone itself is in good shape, and my plan since buying this phone over a year ago was to use it until I physically couldn't anymore. But this seemed like a cheap way for it to give up the ghost.

When I finally checked into my hotel room, the first thing I did was check out the awesome view over Mandalay Bay Beach. The second thing I did was bust out the laptop and spend an hour researching if there's a way to power on a Nexus One without a power button. It seems like an impossible task without taking the phone apart, but I had faith in the Android community.

And I was right to! After a solid 30-40 minutes, I came across a trick one guy had used to power up his N1. I immediately tried it with no luck at all. At this point I was pretty bummed. But 10 minutes later I found another post where a guy had used the same trick... with a twist. I tried that one, my heart in my throat.

... Success!

So the last few days, in between conference stuff and boozing, I've become somewhat of a pro in navigating the N1 without a power button. At first thought, it doesn't seem like that big a deal. But this is what the power button controls:

Power on

Screen on / off while powered on

Menu to power off, reboot, sound profiles, airplane mode (with more or fewer options depending on how yours is set up)

So how does one live without the power button?

First off, powering the phone on. Take the cover plate off. Plug the (A/C or USB) charger in. While the battery is charging, remove the battery. Put it back in. Take it out. Put it in. Take it out. Put it in. Do this about 5 times and the phone will magically power on. It sounds absurd, but it works.

At this point I suppose it would be prudent to mention that I'm running CyanogenMod 7, a custom Android OS. This actually saved my ass from the beginning because I already had the it set to allow pressing the trackball to wake the phone. If you're running stock Android, you'll have to do all your MacGyvering as soon as you get the N1 powered up using the aforementioned trick. If it goes to sleep and you can't wake the phone up using the trackball, you're pretty screwed and will have to start from scratch.

Now, about accessing all the different features the power button offers... (Some of these apps require root, btw.)

First off, if you're running CM, go into the CM Input settings and turn on trackball wake! After you've done that, it's a whole lot easier to manage.

Next, you need an app like Quick Reboot in order to reboot the phone. You can also use it to power the phone off, but then of course you have to use the battery in/out trick to get it back on.

To easily manage sound profiles (silent, vibrate, normal, etc.), check out Profile widget. There's also an Airplane mode widget by the same dev.

Lastly, even on the shortest setting, if you want to turn the screen off you have to wait at least 30 seconds. This sucks for answering a text and then putting the phone back into your pocket. Pockets do crazy things with touchscreens. There's a really neat app called Screen Off and Lock. I have it set to be in the "Ongoing" area when I swipe down into the notification screen. Now I can quickly swipe down and lock the phone.

Phew. The hoops we jump through for our devices. But it works!

61 year old to play football for Faulkner Univ. in Montgomery, AL

Fri, 02 Sep 2011 16:36:49 GMT

From today's Daily Fix in The Wall Street Journal:

And if you need yet another reason to believe once again in the fun of college football, there's Faulkner University in Montgomery, Ala., where 61-year-old Alan Moore will suit up as the team's kicker. Moore, an avocado farmer, left college after his freshman year to fight in Vietnam and went straight into construction when he returned. But he got the itch to kick, set up goal posts in his daughter's yard and worked his way onto the Faulkner team, where he has three years of remaining eligibility. "For Moore, the real lesson is about perseverance," Frank Couch of the Birmingham News writes. "Not in pursuing football again, but in pursuing his education. That's the real message he hopes to get across."

Biggest Loser Update

Wed, 24 Aug 2011 13:56:36 GMT

Back in April, I joined a Biggest Loser competition with some friends. Happy to report that out of 13 or 14 people, I ended up in 2nd place with 12.5% of my body weight lost. I went from 207 lbs. down to about 180 lbs. The last few weeks of the competition were especially difficult since the tornado not only destroyed my gym, but sort of rocked all of our healthy lifestyles for a while. I didn't make it the entire 10 weeks without alcohol, but I did go 7 weeks and 2 days, which I think is pretty damn good.

The biggest question was would I gain it all back after? Almost three months later, so far, so good. Even with limited workouts at the University Rec Center (average maybe twice a week), and less than strict diet, I'm actually weighing in at just under 180 lbs. I've continued to cut Coke out of my diet completely. (I drink maybe one per week or less.) I try to run with Gabs around the Quad once a week.

Which reminds me - ran my first race ever on July 4th. Just two miles in Northport. Nothing major. Somehow it was my best time ever (18:30) even though the race was at 7:30am and I was hungover and still kind of drunk. Almost threw up in the first 30 seconds, but fought it back! I think I placed right in the middle of the pack, maybe #61 out of 120 or so. At least I beat all the moms running with their babies in slings. I'm not really a fan of running in general, but small races like these are fun if for no other reason than just being measuring sticks. Might run another race in September. This time a 5K. We'll see. I like the "free" t-shirts, anyway.

"The Most Dangerous Man"

Tue, 09 Aug 2011 20:50:13 GMT

All government, in its essence, is a conspiracy against the superior man: its one permanent object is to oppress him and cripple him. If it be aristocratic in organization, then it seeks to protect the man who is superior only in law against the man who is superior in fact; if it be democratic, then it seeks to protect the man who is inferior in every way against both.

One of its primary functions is to regiment men by force, to make them as much alike as possible and as dependent upon one another as possible, to search out and combat originality among them. All it can see in an original idea is potential change, and hence an invasion of its prerogatives.

The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself, without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane and intolerable, and so, if he is romantic, he tries to change it. And even if he is not romantic personally he is very apt to spread discontent among those who are.

-- H. L. Mencken

Bonus quote: "Government is a broker in pillage, and every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods."

History of Flight

Thu, 07 Jul 2011 13:55:00 GMT

Weather permitting, tomorrow will mark the beginning of the end for the space shuttle program. A crew of only four people will fly NASA's 135th and final shuttle mission.

I have mixed feelings about the whole thing. On one hand, I recognize that the shuttle fleet is old. The International Space Station is now complete. It's time for a new mission.

On the other hand, you can't help but be sad. The space shuttle is one of the most iconic American images. You look at it, with that big, bold U N I T E D S T A T E S emblazoned on the side, and you can't help but feel pride for what this country has accomplished.

It'll be years before the U.S. gets back into space. I hope that when it happens again, we can recapture some of the lost magic of the 1960s, when people weren't complacent about the audacity and danger of space travel. There's no such thing as a "routine" mission. It took the Columbia disaster for my generation to understand that.

If you haven't seen it yet, I highly recommend the HBO miniseries From the Earth to the Moon, produced and narrated by Tom Hanks. Watch it. You'll be glad you did.

A quick history of the shuttle fleet:

Enterprise: first shuttle flight (1977); used only for testing gliding and landing; not built for orbital space flight

Columbia: first orbital (1981) and operational (1982) space flight; disintegrated during atmospheric re-entry (2003) - all seven crew members died

Challenger: broke apart 73 seconds after launch (1986) - all seven crew members died

Atlantis: first shuttle to launch space probe (1989): flew final shuttle mission (2011)

Discovery: launched the Hubble Space Telescope (1990); retired (2011)

Endeavor: first International Space Station mission (1998); retired (2011)

Last.fm, Pandora, NMA, Marc Broussard

Mon, 30 May 2011 14:25:31 GMT

I've been a huge fan of last.fm for a long time (and from back when it was still Audioscrobbler). I've scrobbled almost 35,000 songs to the site since 2004. It's done a great job of recommending new music to me based off the type of music I've listened to in the past.

But as of this month, the last.fm player for Android is no longer free. I shouldn't be too surprised. The site itself has been largely unimpressive since it was purchased by CBS. I can't think of any new features that have been added. It basically just sustains... with fewer and fewer listening options as the months roll by. I stuck with last.fm while everyone was raving about Pandora. How could Pandora know what I want to listen to? I've scrobbled 35,000 tracks to last.fm! They know me better!

Well last night, since I couldn't use the last.fm Android player anymore, I redownloaded Pandora and gave it a shot. Wowsa. Maybe I just got lucky, but it was great. I started off listening to "North Mississippi Allstars" radio because I was in the mood for some bluesy rock. I eventually had to force myself to stop listening so I could go to sleep.

One of the songs that popped up was "Home" by Marc Broussard. I know his name but have never really listened to him before. Will definitely look him up now. I went ahead and impulsed purchased the album "Home" is on, called "Bootleg To Benefit The Victims of Hurricane Katrina." Five songs and only $3.77 on Amazon. (And since I was on my phone, I had Amazon download the music to the new Amazon Cloud Player.)

So check it out, and here's the first track: Home. Also, happy Memorial Day! (I say this while at work... What a gyp.)

Tuscaloosa Tornado - 4/27/2011

Wed, 04 May 2011 15:38:25 GMT

I don't even know how to write this post, but I have to write it. A week ago today, one of the fiercest tornadoes to ever hit the state of Alabama landed right here in Tuscaloosa. (Click here to see weather related Google Maps.) If you own a TV and live in the U.S., you probably saw. As of now, the official death toll is 40 with 80 people still missing (down from over 700-800 originally). I saw the actual tornado myself out the back window in my house. It might have been the most terrifying (and mesmerizing) thing I've ever seen. I kept thinking to myself, "I need to get into the bathtub." But I just stood there staring at it. I watched parts of houses behind mine lose shingles, siding, and lawn furniture. As it went left to right I realized it was going down Hargrove Rd. and heading toward 15th St. But I really had no idea what was happening.

That moment of clarity would come later.

The power went out in the middle of this. After I lost sight of the tornado, I ran outside into the street and saw this:

Leon and I started walking up the street, asking people if they were all right. Trees everywhere. Roofs all torn up. We made our way toward the ZAP office on the corner of Hargrove and Arlington to see if his Jeep was still there. As we walked down 2nd Ave. E., the trees were on top of people's houses. Power poles were down.

It was an "awesome" sight - in the classical sense of the word. But I didn't have that real moment of clarity until I walked down Hargrove and got to the top of 1st Ave. That's when I first began to understand the scope of what had just happened.

I think I just kind of stood there for a minute with my mouth hanging open. You see this kind of stuff on TV in other parts of the world. You don't see it yourself in your own town.

By the time it was all over, most of Forest Lake, part of 15th St., and almost all of the Alberta City neighborhood were destroyed. The tornado was now on its way to Birmingham and Huntsville.

I've read that the most singular thing about this tornado, aside from the sheer intensity of it, was how long it stayed on the ground. (80 miles?) Here is the path it took through Tuscaloosa.

For those of you who don't know the area, my house is just below the RD part of the HARGROVE RD label in the bottom left quadrant. The University of Alabama takes up that white area on the west side of McFarland Blvd. between University Blvd. and the river. DCH Hospital is the smaller white area underneath it where University Blvd. and Bryant Dr. intersect.

As for my house itself, it's actually ok. There are pictures in the album linked below. I lost a couple of shingles, but that's all. My neighbors all lost a lot more shingles and some siding. There are trees everywhere. The gigantic one across the street from me was ripped out of the ground and splayed across the road, blocking us all in the cul de sac for about a day. My power was out for about three days and was restored Saturday around noon. (Thanks, Gulf Power and Alabama Power!) I still don't have cable or internet yet. All the cable and telephone lines are still on the ground, twisted up in trees, and across my driveway.

I am extremely lucky considering people less than a mile away from me lost everything.

My friend Ally rented an apartment in Alberta City (which was destroyed) and was interviewed by The Wall Street Journal. You can see it here: Alabama Student Loses Everything in Storm.

Believe it or not, Charlie Sheen came to visit Tuscaloosa on Monday. I'll be the first to admit, I am not a fan of his. But he did a world of good while he was here, and promises to come back to host a benefit. And so far, he's the only Hollywood type I know of who has actually visited. Sheen has even started a donation web site called Torpedos Against Tornadoes. If you donate $100, you get an autographed baseball. I've heard nothing but good things about him while he was here.

Someone even brought my friend Ally to Sheen's attention and he recorded this video message to her: http://youtu.be/UovPp7q2tAg.

HOW TO HELP

If you feel like you want to help us out, this is a list of charities compiled by The Tuscaloosa News. You can text REDCROSS to 90999 to make an instant $10 donation. This is a free text if you're on T-Mobile, and if you follow that link, you can see before and after pictures of the T-Mobile store on 15th St.

One last thing: I've read multiple reports from multiple people that FEMA and everyone else here from the federal government are all deeply impressed by the organized nature of the local Tuscaloosa disaster response. I haven't been in any other disaster areas, but I can personally attest to the response effort here. It is absolutely amazing. More donations are pouring in than we even know what to do with - clothing, food, water, etc. (The difficulty at this point is distribution, not collection.) Even something as simple as blood donations. There have been so many people lined up to give blood and so much given already that some of the blood banks have temporarily stopped taking it for a couple of days. You even have to make an appointment at some places! I've never been prouder to be an Alabamian or a Tuscaloosan.

And when the dust settles from all of this, Mayor Walt Maddox deserves a medal. I'm serious.

Here is my album of photos uploaded to Picasa. These are only from the neighborhoods right around me. There are many other areas in Tuscaloosa that were equally devastated.

Tuscaloosa Tornado

Mark Ingram on the cover of NCAA Football 12

Tue, 19 Apr 2011 18:13:19 GMT

It's a beautiful thing. :)

My Biggest Loser Program

Sat, 02 Apr 2011 04:32:53 GMT

A friend of mine asked me what kind of diet I had to follow for the Biggest Loser competition my friends and I are having. There's nothing I "have" to do, of course. But my reply to her was so freaking long, I decided it might be a good idea to post here and possibly help someone else who wants to lose weight but doesn't quite know where to start. I mean, it's easy to say, "Work out! Eat healthy!" But it's a little overwhelming at first.

Keep in mind, every person is different. Some people can give up things more easily than others. Example: I gave up Coke. Some people wouldn't dream of giving up Coke - or sweet tea. Inversely, cheese is not so good for you. But I refuse to give up cheese, except in the form of cheese fries, nachos, etc. I will still put cheese slices on sandwiches and whatnot. The important thing is to decide what you can and can't do, then stick with it.

This is my program:

1) Give up alcohol and Coke - I plan on reintroducing alcohol on June 1 when the competition is over (more moderately than before), but not Coke. (*crossing my fingers*) It's fine to drink one beer or glass a wine per day, but I'm just gonna go cold turkey for a while. It'll do me good in more ways than one. Coke and the like is just bad for you, though. Sweet tea is included in the ban. Water is boring, but you get used to it. I used to scoff at people who ordered water in a restaurant, but now I'm doing it. It'll save you two bucks a meal to boot.

2) Gym - I started weight lifting with a friend, but cardio is the important thing. At least 20 minutes per session every couple of days to start with, then 30 minutes per session every other day. Try to walk more throughout the day. Oftentimes at lunch, I walk all the way from Student Services down to the Strip. (That's a 10-15 minute walk each way.) I also refuse to use the elevator in the parking deck (four levels) or in the building (two floors). That should be common sense.

Planet Fitness in Tuscaloosa costs $10 a month (I can't remember if there's a startup fee) - and you can cancel it at any time. They offer free lessons on stuff, too, so it's good for beginners. Just don't go on Monday evenings or in January...

3) Diet - IMO, doing the first two mean I can cheat a little with the diet. (Consider this Phase 1. Adjusting your diet is hard. After you get used to going without some things and adding other things, move on to Phase 2 and get a little more hardcore - if you want.) I try to cut out all fast food. I still go to places I would normally visit (non-fast food places), but stay away from the obviously awful things like cheese fries, bloomin' onions, fried stuff, etc. I try to get grilled stuff or sandwiches with wheat bread and so on. Sometimes I even eat the salad that comes with it. It's no one big thing - it's the sum of all the little things, like switching from white to wheat bread.

The biggest thing after staying away from fast food and fried stuff is portion control. Almost any restaurant you visit will give you enough for two meals. Just eat half and take the rest home. It's almost important to eat slowwwwwwly. If you eat slowly, you will get full without scarfing down everything on your plate. Your brain is late to the party in this regard. You won't be aware your stomach is full for a few minutes. So eating slowly will help you not overeat.

When you portion control, it's important to eat less per sitting, but more often throughout the day. For me, I force down a bowl of cereal in the morning when I get up to get my metabolism going. Around 10am, I eat a banana. Around 11:30 or 12 I eat lunch. Around 4pm I eat a granola bar. Around 7 or 7:30 I eat dinner. If I'm still hungry after that, I eat a few peanuts. I have some organic fruit in the fridge, too. One organic grapefruit is perfect because it's smaller than a normal grapefruit. It's easy to eat with your sandwich. (Well, easy because there isn't too much of it. It's not easy to actually cut the fruit out.)

No desserts. I really don't need them. My biggest temptation in 9 days has been the gigantic cookie cake in the office kitchen. You know I love me some cookie cake. I almost had a piece, too. I was in there filling up my water cup, and first thought, "Nah... But... maybe just one small piece." Then a huge fat lady walked in. I took it as a sign from God and hightailed it outta there! I think the only dessert I've had was a peanut butter cookie from Jason's Deli on Day 1.

Your first thought will be: "I can't eat that much food in a day!" If you do your cardio as often as you should, then amazingly, you can. I have found this out! More so even when you are weight lifting. (Btw, don't start lifting weights without some sort of instruction first. You can and will hurt yourself. Positioning and posture is just as important as the weight you are lifting.)

And looooooots of water throughout the day! You should have to pee 6 times a day! (Hot green tea is good, too.) Don't drink stuff with sugar - like sweet tea, sorry! Or with lots of sodium - like Powerade and Gatorade. Even when working out, the sports drinks aren't worth the sodium. In 9 days of doing this, the only thing I've had to drink is water and hot tea... which is water. And honestly, I'm not missing the other drinks as much as I thought I would.

That's basically it. There are lots of guides out there, but I wanted to write as someone who isn't out to make a buck. The key is to pace yourself. If you throw everything you have into the first few days, you'll flame out quickly. I like the idea of a 10 week period. It gives you time to set a pattern and adapt. And this might seem obvious, but it helps to have a friend doing all of this with you. It's easy to fool yourself sometimes, but it's harder to let a friend down. "Ehhh I don't wanna go to the gym today... But dammit, I'm meeting so and so. Might as well go."

Oh, and one more thing. Don't weigh yourself everyday! It's normal to fluctuate 5 pounds either way throughout the day. And by weighing in too often, you'll just stress yourself out with the added pressure. Weigh once a week only and keep it logged.

If this works out and I'm still living the healthier lifestyle on June 1, I'll have Candice and Casey to thank the most. Candice put the competition together, and Casey is my gym buddy who tells me what to do. I just follow orders. It's easier that way!

Opening Day 2011!

Fri, 01 Apr 2011 14:49:06 GMT

It's Opening Day in baseball! (Technically it was yesterday, but only a few teams played.) I got to see two innings of the Braves victory against the Nats during a tasty sushi lunch at Bento. Derek Lowe pitched like he was still in Boston, and Jason Heyward smacked his second consecutive Opening Day home run on his first at bat. The only other player to do this in MLB history is Kaz Matsui (of all people) for the Mets in 2004 and 2005.

Baseball is infinitely more exciting for me when I have a fantasy team to manage. And this year will definitely be the toughest. I was invited to join a very competitive private league with 16 teams. (I've only played in 12 team leagues.) On top of that, we have 24 roster spots, which makes the pool of available players considerably shallow. Sixteen teams drafting 24 rounds took almost exactly three hours! And that didn't even count the first three rounds since they were used to assigned keepers.

Browsing Reddit this morning, I saw the image on the right, reminding me that it's almost time for playoff hockey! Only five regular season games left for the Red Wings, who are in their usual spot atop the Western Conference Central Division. The Predators are nipping at their heels, though, but that could be a good thing. Maybe we'll get a Wings vs. Preds rematch and I'll see a game in Nashville again!

Bama basketball lost in the NIT finals last night to Wichita St. Sad we didn't win, but I'm hugely impressed with what Anthony Grant has done in just his second season as head coach. My only fear is that he leaves us too early to coach another, more glamorous school. Fingers crossed.

As far as my life is concerned, I guess the only (moderately) interesting news is I joined a Biggest Loser competition. I'm trying to lose the biggest percentage of my body weight against 13 other people (some of whom have already dropped out?) over 10 weeks. There's a cash prize at the end, so that's my dangling carrot. Well, that and I want to get back into shape. I've become too much of a sedentary fat ass. I've dropped alcohol and Coke (by far the hardest thing), hit the gym with Casey, and altered my diet a bit. We're one week into it now, and I'm off to a decent start. Now I'm battling an apparent cold, so that is slowing me down a little with regard to the gym. But I've still managed to go maybe 5 days out of 8.

Back to work... blah.

How to sort Outlook email into "conversations"

Tue, 22 Mar 2011 18:10:20 GMT

When you receive mail in Outlook, by default everything is "Arranged by: Date" - meaning your inbox is probably a gigantic list of email with no threading. Why can't it be like Gmail with threaded conversations??

It can! A coworker taught me this trick a few years ago and I've been forever grateful. This should work in Outlook 2003 and above, but I'm creating these instructions using Outlook 2010. And the best part about this is beginning with Exchange 2007, your settings are saved on your server account. So once you set it, you don't have to do it again if you format your computer and have to reinstall Windows and Outlook.

This is mercifully easy if you have Outlook 2010. All you have to do is right-click any column (Date, From, Subject, etc.) and click Show as Conversations. (It's up to you if you want to also check Show in Groups.)

This can also be done in Outlook 2007 and 2003. However, I'm not a big fan of default "conversation" view. This is what I do:

Right-click the column named Arrange By: Date and choose View Settings

Click the second button: Group By. You may have to uncheck the top-most box: Automatically group according to arrangement. Then in the first dropdown box, change the value to Conversation and click OK.

Click the third button: Sort. In the first dropdown box, change the value to (none) and click OK.

Click OK again to get out of the View Settings screen.

Voila! Your messages are now sorted based on conversation. Keep in mind, this is the way I sort my email, and I like it. You may not like it. But now that you know where all the options are, you can go play with them as you see fit!

U.S. attacks Libya, displeases Senator Obama

Mon, 21 Mar 2011 03:30:06 GMT

Yesterday we started firing cruise missiles and shit at Libya. It was in support of French fighter jets attacking the Libyan air force, which was massacring the "rebels," as they have been called. I'm not sure when a rebel becomes a revolutionary, but it seems like they should be pretty close now.

Anyway, I'm not saying we should or shouldn't be helping. Gaddafi is your typical power hungry dictator with no regard for human rights. But I did run across this interesting bit of commentary from Barrack Obama himself when asked this question: In what circumstances, if any, would the president have constitutional authority to bomb Iran without seeking a use-of-force authorization from Congress?

Keep in mind, this question was asked of Senator Obama back in 2007. The same Obama who previously spent 12 years as a constitutional law professor at the University of Chicago Law School.

His answer (emphasis mine):

The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation.

As Commander-in-Chief, the President does have a duty to protect and defend the United States. In instances of self-defense, the President would be within his constitutional authority to act before advising Congress or seeking its consent. History has shown us time and again, however, that military action is most successful when it is authorized and supported by the Legislative branch. It is always preferable to have the informed consent of Congress prior to any military action.

The U.S. may have international (read: coalition of U.N. members and/or the Arab League) backing for these attacks, but Congress must authorize military actions when there is no imminent threat. There is none here. Gaddafi cannot reach us or anything American. All he wants to do is murder his own citizens. If we want to step up and help, fine. But the public informs its elected leaders (reps and senators), and they in turn authorize the president.

Constitutional law fail?

P.S. This can be applied to Iraq, Afghanistan, Bosnia, etc.

P.P.S. In what reality is imposing a "no-fly zone" not an act of war? Have we declared war on Libya? (No. See above.)

Meters Medley

Mon, 14 Mar 2011 06:21:49 GMT

Thanks to the XM Satellite Radio search site, I was able to track down another awesome song. This one's an obscure jam track played at a concert in Denver, CO (on my 27th birthday!). It's a collaboration between Bonerama and Porter Batiste Stoltz.

Near as I can tell, it's like a New Orleans style jazz / jam band fusion.

Porter Batiste Stoltz & Bonerama - Meters Medley

5 Years at UA

Thu, 10 Mar 2011 21:58:42 GMT

On this day five years ago, I began my full time employment with The University of Alabama. Roll Tide!

That is all.

Zelda and Link hit 25 years

Tue, 22 Feb 2011 20:59:17 GMT

Yesterday was a pretty crappy day for me, so I missed this little tidbit of news. Twenty-five years ago, on Feb. 21, 1986, The Legend of Zelda was released in Japan. (North America would get it in August of 1987.)

It wasn't the first video game I had at home. (We owned an Atari somesuch with games like Centipede, Asteroids, and Dig Dug.) But it was one of the most memorable! One of the greatest times of the year (besides Christmas, of course) was in February, when my parents and two of their closest out of town friends would go to the Phantom Host ball - some kind of Mardi Gras / debutante thing. Left at home was Ben (the out of towners' son), my sister, and me. It was the only time of year my dad would let us bring the Nintendo from the bedroom out into the den. That was a big deal since this was the 1980s and our bedroom TV was pretty small. I'm thinking 12"-16".

The TV in the den was this big (I'm thinking 24" or so), old Zenith model inside a wooden cabinet thing. The first time I saw that Zelda world map displayed on the TV, it was just amazing. We would literally sit right up in front of the TV just like you see idiot children do. We'd keep on playing until the parents got home.

Interestingly, this was sort of the impetus for me becoming who I am today. I'm not even kidding. After one of those weekend Zelda benders in the den, the out of town friends went home and I needed to bring the Nintendo back into the bedroom. Well I did that part easily enough, but I didn't know how to hook it up. I had always depended on Dad to do that. I probably waited a day or two for him to hook this thing back up, but either he was busy or wasn't home. So finally I got tired of waiting and set about fixing it myself.

Looking back on it, of course it's really stupidly simple. There's the power supply, and there's the audio/video cable. But as I suppose I was not more than 10 years old at the time, I felt like a champ. From that point on, I didn't really get that feeling of intimidation from wires and cables anymore. Or at the very least it was mitigated. Today, of course, I do network admin stuff at work, and a/v cabling is a fairly big part of my life at home. How much of this do I owe to The Legend of Zelda?

"I do mind. The Dude minds. This aggression will not stand, man."

Sat, 19 Feb 2011 16:09:57 GMT

Update: Turns out the whole thing is fake. Dang.

[original "press release"]

You Just Can't Stop It

Mon, 14 Feb 2011 20:48:17 GMT

Heard this song on satellite radio the other day and prayed I would remember the name of it later. I didn't. Not even which station it was on! But I did find this awesome web site:

http://www.dogstarradio.com/search_xm_playlist.php

I plugged in the day and approximate time I heard it along with "Doobie" as the artist, and bam.

The Doobie Brothers - You Just Can't Stop It